1. Do not have a "themed" wedding.
Now I never realized that this was actually a problem until the TV show "Four Weddings" came out. Y'all, those Yankee girls are all about having themed weddings. If I see one more wedding that is "Old Hollywood", "Hawaiian Luau", "Forth of July Barbecue", or "Winter Wonderland" themed, I'll gag on my Oreos (I have a small addiction). Ladies, your wedding's only theme should be "wedding themed". Period. End of Story.
Now, let me be clear, every bride should choose her colors and decorations and flowers according to her own taste and each bride should pull from the variety of influences that she sees her big day in. Weddings vary according to tastes and likes and dislikes. By all means, pull elements from time periods or events that you find inspirational. But save the themes for children's birthday parties, and sweet sixteens.
And while i'm at it.... your wedding should scream TIMELESS, not DATED in ten years. Please, I know there are all sorts of crazy trends right now, but to me, classic just lasts. Are black tuxes with black bow ties going out of style anytime soon? Nope, probably not. Is that interesting getup with funky exposed socks, matching ties and suspenders gonna be in style in ten years?? Probably NOT. Come on ladies, if you aren't normally someone with 'funky' style, don't pull out the funk for your wedding day. There's no reason to reinvent the wheel. Just take a classic timeless idea and give it your own little twist!
2. Avoid the cash bar.
Weddings are ridiculously expensive. And not all of us can afford to provide a full bar at the reception. But here's my advice. Don't have a cash bar. Its just tacky to ask your guests to pay for drinks. Skip the alcohol all together if you think your guests wouldn't mind. If your guests would prefer to have alcohol, limit the menu to only beer and wine, which are less expensive and easier to serve than liquor drinks. Or you have another option. Have two signature drinks (sangria, gin and lemonade, margaritas, etc.) - one of the bride's favorites and one of the groom's. You can mix large quantities of them in pretty, large glass decanters and guests can help themselves. Limiting the liquor options is a good way to limit your spending on alcohol. You won't go broke and your guests can still get loosened up enough to Macarena on the dance floor!
3. You are not a princess.
Unless you were born Catherine Elizabeth Middleton, you are not a princess. You are not Cinderella. So stop limiting yourself to only ball gowns big enough to house a family of four. Choose what looks best for your body, not what you think Snow White would have worn when she tied the knot with Prince Charming. If a ball gown looks great on you, go for it. If a dropped waist is more flattering, do that instead. Look like your best version of yourself on your wedding day, not a knock off version of Sleeping Beauty. And for heaven's sake DO NOT WEAR A TIARA. I will have the unrelenting urge to slap it off your head. You have been forewarned.
4. Unity candles and unity sand annoy me
I think this is a modern fad... at least I certainly hope so. I just don't understand the point. I think saying "to have and to hold until death do us part" ties you to your husband sufficiently for eternity more than mixing two viles of dirt together. Just my humble opinion. And besides, chances are in the reality of the situation your two families probably aren't BFF's so pretending your families are dirt and mixing them together in one jar is just supremely bizarre.
5. Soloists during your ceremony -- JUST NO.
Look y'all, I know your sorority sister Mary Margaret sang in the university talent show and y'all all got drunk and bought votes from the judges with your daddy's money so she would win because her boyfriend had just dumped her and her confidence was lower than low, but note for you... SHE CAN'T SING. I don't know if you were just too drunk to remember, but she never can quite hit those high notes. Please, please.... for the love of all things Holy, do NOT bring her into the church and have her sing Ave Maria in front of your 400+ wedding guests. Besides, have you ever read a translation of the lyrics to Ave Maria? It is NOT a wedding song! And even worse, no one wants to hear your mediocre soloist sing Shania Twain's From This Moment, or some other cheesey song. Puhlease.... If you want music as part of your ceremony, as most people do, please consider a harp player or pianist like a sane human being.
More later!
-Ada Grey and Caroline Grace
PS: Use burlap and Mason jars sparingly. Its becoming a little over done. A little of that goes a long way.
4. Unity candles and unity sand annoy me
I think this is a modern fad... at least I certainly hope so. I just don't understand the point. I think saying "to have and to hold until death do us part" ties you to your husband sufficiently for eternity more than mixing two viles of dirt together. Just my humble opinion. And besides, chances are in the reality of the situation your two families probably aren't BFF's so pretending your families are dirt and mixing them together in one jar is just supremely bizarre.
5. Soloists during your ceremony -- JUST NO.
Look y'all, I know your sorority sister Mary Margaret sang in the university talent show and y'all all got drunk and bought votes from the judges with your daddy's money so she would win because her boyfriend had just dumped her and her confidence was lower than low, but note for you... SHE CAN'T SING. I don't know if you were just too drunk to remember, but she never can quite hit those high notes. Please, please.... for the love of all things Holy, do NOT bring her into the church and have her sing Ave Maria in front of your 400+ wedding guests. Besides, have you ever read a translation of the lyrics to Ave Maria? It is NOT a wedding song! And even worse, no one wants to hear your mediocre soloist sing Shania Twain's From This Moment, or some other cheesey song. Puhlease.... If you want music as part of your ceremony, as most people do, please consider a harp player or pianist like a sane human being.
More later!
-Ada Grey and Caroline Grace
PS: Use burlap and Mason jars sparingly. Its becoming a little over done. A little of that goes a long way.
No comments:
Post a Comment